05 Jun The Extroverted Woman’s Guide to Dating (and Mating With) An Introvert
I'm an extroverted woman in a long-term relationship with an introverted man. It has mostly been easy, but some things have definitely been an adjustment – for both of us.
But before we talk about relationships, let's think about what the words “extrovert” and “introvert” actually mean. It might surprise you to learn that they have less to do with how loud someone is and more to do with how they recharge. Check it out:
So, don't be fooled into thinking that all introverts are shy recluses (The Myers and Briggs Foundation says otherwise) and all extroverts are outgoing and annoying. That definitely isn't the case all of the time, although introverts do tend to be quieter than extroverts in general.
I'd actually consider myself much less outgoing than other extroverts (otherwise, I'd never survive working alone as a writer all day!), and I'd consider my boyfriend a somewhat outgoing introvert.
He's the first introvert I've been in a serious, long-term relationship with. And I'm the first extrovert that he has been in a long-term relationship with. Ever.
As you can imagine, this has caused a couple of misunderstandings and communication issues. But now, after being together for 3 years, we've worked through most of them and have gotten used to each other's tendencies.
If you're dating an introverted man and struggling, or if you're thinking about pursuing a relationship with one, here are a few things you'll want to consider trying to make things go more smoothly:
Find a Happy Medium
So, you've met a great new guy (or are trying to figure out the one you already have). Awesome! But then... you find out that he doesn't want to go out very often. He'd much rather stay in and read a book, watch a movie, or play some video games.